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Odds & Ends on Business Event Etiquette

UPDATE: 'Tis the holiday season -- family, tradition, joy. . . and business related celebrations -- too many to count. Right now is a great time to reinvigorate, renew and begin great relationships! I am reaching back into my archives this holiday season to bring back some of the most popular posts on event networking -- tips and ideas that will help you make the most of this December.

Odds & Ends on Business Event Etiquette
Here are some random tips I've picked up over the years on appropriate behaviors and courtesies when attending a business function:

• Have your business card in an easy to reach location: If someone asks for a business card and you have to dig around your pockets or purse to find one what you are actually communicating is, "I didn't anticipate meeting anyone I'd want to know." Later when they look at the dog-eared card you finally produced they will be reminded again....
• Keep your right hand out of your pocket and free of hors d'œuvres -- Shaking a clammy, sweaty or geasy hand is just no fun for the other person.
• When talking with someone look them in the eye: It is rather unsettling to talk to a person when their eyes are darting back and forth and not focusing on you.
  
• When talking with someone use his/her name in your conversation: People like to hear their own name! It is familiar, comforting and a signal that you really care about talking to him/her.
• Use small words and speak slowly: Especially if the event is large and there is a lot of background noise. Amazingly , people like to hear and understand what someone is saying to them.
• Smile and be optimistic: The perky optimist is always the most popular person in the room. "Life is good, opportunity abounds and the best is yet to come" -- spread it like butter at every event you attend.
  
• Always thank the host(s): This simple yet widely overlooked courtesy will guarantee a return invitation and favored treatment.

Proper business etiquette is more than just knowing which fork to use or water glass to drink from. These were just a few, random ways to conduct myself at a business event that I hope you honor when you are at yours.

Is This Exciting or What!? The Wild West of Legal Marketing

I met me, twenty-five years ago, this evening in San Francisco -- a shout out to Ali, an incredible young marketing talent that gave me a chance to express why I love what I do...

I had an early dinner with some VC friends to talk shop and blah, blah, blah. Afterward I sought out the one cigar bar I heard was in the area to indulge my joy in a good stick and happened into a couple of great conversations, one of which renewed my joy for what I do.

Ali (remember the shout-out a few sentences ago) is a by-choice out-of-work marketing person looking for her next challenge and she was intrigued that my profession is marketing for a law firm. She reminded me the journey is more interesting than the destination. Her excitement about what I do reminded me of what I already know but may have forgotten for a moment:

• Marketing a law firm is so custom and nontraditional to all things book-smart that every day has new excitement and lessons.
• Marketing a law firm is still so new a profession we are all still discovering nuances at a 1000mph.
• Lawyers and law firms are incredible, non-stop think-tanks that challenge me to be at the top of my game every moment, every day.
• Law firms are first-class operations allowing me the opportunity to be in circles of influence most people dream of (even when I am not yet equal to the people and communities of the circle).
• Lawyers and law firms absolutely demand creative thinking.
  

At the end of our conversation Ali was completely motivated to explore my profession, and more importantly I was inspired to keep doing what I've chosen. Out here in the wild west of law firm marketing I am pleased to ride the fences....

Is this exciting or WHAT!? You betcha!
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10 Things Lawyers Can Do to Turn Off Potential Clients

1. Appear Passive: Clients want a Champion, not a wimp! The positive stereotype of a lawyer is, "smart, sharp, strategically aggressive, intuitive, reassuring, and confident." Be anything less and you offer nothing for a potential client to believe in.
   
2. Be Boring: Most of any client relationship is their ability to connect to YOU. Being insufferable and long-winded is a recipe for a short term relationship. By the way, how many insufferable bores do you keep close to you?
   
3. Look Scruffy: One of the reasons law firm office decor should appear to be the habitat of success is that people want to retain successful lawyers. If you do not dress as a success yourself you are definitely sending a bad message about your ability to represent. Get it? If you look good you must be good. If you look bad you must suck!
4. Be Too Committed: Professional distance is a good thing. Appearing objective with reason is what clients want. If you make every matter a cause and personal mission your objectivity and attractiveness decline significantly.
   
5. Have Dodgy Peers: Your friends and valued peers are a good indicator of who you are. If you insist on hanging out with objectionable people (to your target clients) then get used to having objectionable clients.
   
6. Be Too Boastful: Say just enough and you are golden, say too much and you are a self-indulging bore. The best way to manage talking about yourself is to shut up and wait to be asked.
   
7. Talk Only About Yourself: In no setting ever is it appropriate for you to monopolize a conversation by talking about you. As matter of fact if you contribute more than 30% of the words spoken you are on the losing side.
8. Be a Zealot About Your Beliefs: A business setting is not a place for a recruiting new zealots to your beliefs. Ever! Leave your flags and causes at the door.
   
9. Use Corny Tag Lines and Platitudes: "I am the number one person in my field", and "I can take care of you like you've never been taken care of before." is stuff any idiot can recite. If you use any tag line it means you are trying too hard! Instead, just relax and have a normal conversation. What you hope to communicate will come out naturally in its own good time.
10. Say Him/Her is Wrong: Just because he/she has made poor choices is no reason to destroy your chances at putting things right. Do not offer to fix their mistakes -- offer to present new opportunities.
    

A Brief History of Choosing a Lawyer

Marketing has certainly evolved in 59 years yet some things never change. Below is my take on the evolution of client development in that period of time.

1955: Word of mouth, personal introductions, reputation -- lawyer would show up for face-to-face meeting with a business card. Potential client was completely reliant on trusted personal relationships and chemistry of interaction.

1965: Word of mouth, personal introductions, reputation -- lawyer would show up for face-to-face meeting with a business card. More savvy lawyers would have a folder with recent cases and a biography. Potential client was completely reliant on trusted personal relationships and chemistry of interaction.

1975: Word of mouth, personal introductions, reputation -- lawyer would show up for face-to-face meeting with a business card and a folder with recent cases, firm information, and a biography. More savvy firms would have bio's of other team members proposed in matter. Potential client was completely reliant on trusted personal relationships and chemistry of interaction.

1985: Word of mouth, news generated by industry organizations, daily's and specialty publishers, personal introductions, reputation -- lawyer would show up for face-to-face meeting with a business card and a folder with recent cases, firm information, team biographies. More savvy firms were printing marketing materials in four-color. Potential client was completely reliant on trusted personal relationships and chemistry of interaction.

1995: Word of mouth, news generated by industry organizations, daily's and specialty publishers, personal introductions, reputation -- lawyer would show up for face-to-face meeting with team of lawyers, business cards, four-color marketing materials including recent cases and firm capabilities, team biographies. More savvy firms were demonstrating nascent internet and electronic presence . Potential client was completely reliant on trusted personal relationships and chemistry of interaction.

2005: Word of mouth, news generated by industry organizations, daily's and specialty publishers, personal introductions, reputation -- lawyer would show up for face-to-face meeting with team of lawyers, business cards, four-color marketing materials including recent cases and complete firm capabilities, team biographies. More savvy firms were offering electronic marketing materials, web site references and internet based client solutions plus references to internet based rating sites and public domain accolades. Potential client was completely reliant on trusted personal relationships and chemistry of interaction.

2009: Word of mouth, news generated by industry organizations, daily's and specialty publishers, personal introductions, reputation -- lawyer would show up for face-to-face meeting with team of lawyers, business cards, four-color marketing materials including recent cases and complete firm capabilities, team biographies, electronic marketing materials, web site references, internet based client solutions plus references to internet based rating sites and public domain accolades. Savvy firms are exposed through social net via LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, etc. Potential client is completely reliant on trusted personal relationships and chemistry of interaction.

While we have found more ways to introduce ourselves to a potential client the one thing that does not change is: "Potential client is completely reliant on trusted personal relationships and chemistry of interaction."

No matter how incredible and savvy you are in all of the new choices for promoting yourself, ultimately you will only win new business by establishing a trusting relationship and working for strong chemistry with your potential client.

Any questions?

Ah-Ha Moments Can Differentiate a Law Firm

In most instances the practice of law is fairly routine. Repetitive tasks performed for a client to satisfy regulatory, business and court requirements. Definitely each lawyer brings his/her unique skills and insight -- yet so much is routine.

Once in a while though we and our clients experience a moment when our cylinders are running at full speed and all of our experience and knowledge produces an undiscovered path. This is the moment you, and/or your client are completely surprised and exclaim, "AH-HA! Why didn't I/we think of that before!"

In these rare moments are the kernels of what CAN differentiate you from all the other firms and lawyers around you. These moments are the birthplace of packaging a legal product.

Recently two lawyers at my firm experienced such a moment -- they accomplished what no other lawyers had yet imagined and the results were nothing less than remarkable. What they did is not as important as recognizing the moment (and if I offered any details... now that would be giving up too much too soon.).

In solving a challenge these two lawyers actually carved out an entirely new "product" that can be marketed to many clients and prospects. This one AH-HA moment could be a gold mine on a map with no current competitors!

The lesson as a marketer here is to diligently listen for exuberant surprise from a client or lawyer. Behind their surprise may be an entirely new product and category for the marketing team to promote.

5 Tips for Personable Headshots

99% of all lawyer bio photos look like mug shots of the rich and kind of famous. Nice attire, tasteful backdrop, deer-in-the-headlights. I would show examples but the defamation law suits for showing what is already out there would be endless. Go to justaboutanylawfirm-dot-com but your own and you will know I am right.

Several years ago I was fortunate to work with a great model photographer -- his simple tips were so good that ever since even my drivers license photo is complimented.

Stand Unnaturally: When we are just standing around (no cameras) talking away we naturally place our weight on one foot. This weight placement shifts our hips, our shoulders and our chin. But put us in front of a camera and suddenly we are straight and stiff. Force yourself to stand on one foot pointed a bit away from the camera. IT WILL FEEL UNNATURAL but it will be a much more genuine pose. Whether standing or seated the key is to never have your hips facing the camera.

Talk to the Camera: Yup, you heard me. Talk to the camera. Say something silly like "I only have eyes for you" or "What are you looking at big-eye!?". Maybe even name the camera... "O.K. Jim. What are YOU looking at!?" If the camera can become a personality your attitude and composure will relax.

Get Close with the Camera: Lean forward, like you are interested in what happens next. Literally. Lean towards the camera. It feels even more awkward but the results are amazing

Smile Like Recalling a Pleasant Memory: No one needs to see ALL your teeth. That's like serial weird crazy. And no one connects to people with tight lips. Think about a pleasant memory and wear the kind of blissful smile we all wear with warm memories. That does mean your cheeks and eyes are involved. If you do not feel the muscles in your face moving upward a bit you can always practice just a bit more....

Focus Your Eyes Above the Camera: Not like at the moon, but not "deer in the headlights" smack on directly into the lens. Look at anything close BUT NOT AT THE LENS!

If you have the presence to remember these few steps when a camera is aimed in your direction I guarantee you will never have to hide from you photos ever again... and at least your law firm web site mug shot will illustrate your personality.